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&ldo;二爷‐‐爷会死的！咱家还剩着一点福寿膏并太太留下来的烟枪，给爷喷点吧，会出人命的，抽这个总好过见爷痛死啊！&rdo;刘全老泪纵横地跪在地上。&ldo;不行！&rdo;和琳咬着牙道，若是此刻心软就前功尽弃了！他纽古禄和珅不要就此一败涂地‐‐他清楚地记着这句话，他必须帮他，否则这世界上还有谁能帮他！&ldo;二爷！&rdo;刘全还要再说，却只听见屋内一声脆响，接着是死一般的寂静。和琳与刘全立即跳起来破门而入，只见和珅歪靠在炕角，右手捏着个碎瓷片，一腿触目惊心的红。&ldo;哥！&rdo;和琳看地肝胆俱裂，万没想到和珅会用自残的方法来转移自己对鸦片的剧烈渴求。和珅喘出一口灼气，握着瓷片还要去割自己的大腿‐‐&ldo;住手！&rdo;和琳按住他的手，将他紧紧地抱在怀里，&ldo;哥，再这样你会死的！&rdo;&ldo;放开！&rdo;和珅喊了一声，和琳不为所动，他立即发狂似地一脚踢开他，&ldo;滚出去！&rdo;那拔高了的嘶哑声音就象在铁壁上猛力刮削一般叫人毛骨悚然，又是一道划破，鲜血从皮肉间涌了出来，和珅仰高了头，剧烈地喘息着，似乎惟有此刻才能有片刻的解脱。&ldo;哥！&rdo;和琳扑过去一掌打飞他手里染血的瓷片，抱着他一面哭一面喊：&ldo;去他吗的戒毒！刘全，拿家伙，给他喷烟！&rdo;没什么比他哥活着更重要！刘全已经吓傻了，此刻才回过神来，一路连滚带爬地跑出房间。没一会工夫就拿过马佳氏生前的烟枪，手忙脚乱地装好了就对着火要烧，却只听地一声嘶哑地喊叫：&ldo;回来！&rdo;和珅似回复了片刻理智，只是身上依旧冷地发抖，他抹了一把脸上满布的泪水鼻涕，疲惫地连眼都睁不开，只能一个劲地抽搐着：&ldo;和琳……我不能输，我这辈子不想再窝囊地输下去了‐‐你把我绑起来，全身都绑地紧紧地，别让我动也别管我怎么喊‐‐求你了……我不能……抽上那种鬼东西……&rdo;和琳一面拭泪一面连连点头：&ldo;我答应，我都答应！但你得让我陪着你，你想发泄，就咬我的手‐‐多用力都不打紧，别自个儿摧残自个儿，成么？&rdo;和珅经历了他这一生最为难熬的折磨，那种会把人逼疯的痛苦如影随形地侵蚀着他所有的神经，他只能不断地哀号，直到将和琳的双手咬地鲜血淋漓‐‐疼啊，疼入骨髓，疼地他恨不能就此死了‐‐但他不能，他要活下去，活出个人样！他脑海里浮现出了无数的人，和琳，索若木，福长安……乃至……福康安。他如今在哪呢？那个曾经对他发誓若有相负天不假年的男人？在他每一次生死存亡的时候，他都在哪？！在为自己为家族的权势名声奔波卖命！或许她说的对，他对于他来说，终有一天会成为他挥之不去的悔恨。他其实早有预感了……从他，当着他的面没半点犹豫地砍下索若木的首级……他从来都比他还更加冷酷更加深谋远虑……只是他一相情愿地以为他可以为他例外，这段不见容于世的感情‐‐在地位不平等的两人之间，迟早会全盘崩溃，只是从前的他，太傻太天真。他与他都没能剪清那旁根错结的内忧外患，他扪心自问，真要他放弃一切跟随福康安永世见不得人他愿意吗？真要福康安放弃功名与他远走他乡避世无争他又愿意吗？他和他，谁都做不到。或许这世界上，爱情本就不是唯一‐‐何况是他们之间，如在岩石罅隙之间的畸恋，一经光照，立即就粉碎成行将湮灭的流尘。不是不情深义重呵……可在强权之下，都可笑单薄地如一张白纸。他早该幡然醒悟了‐‐这世上，惟有权之一字。：失意人强颜成大礼，离伤酒与君相决绝福长安悄然推开门，那房里静悄悄的，却是一室杂乱。他抬脚跨过一个翻倒在地的花樽，才抬头看见被牢牢缚在炕上的和珅。&ldo;天……&rdo;福长安按下一声惊呼，没想到几天不见，和珅竟变成如此光景，自己这些天来的担心全成了真。他一个箭步上前想要替他解开绳子，和珅早上才发作过一次此时是力竭而息并没睡的实沉，因而一个动静就惊醒过来，朦胧间见有人扑在他身上直觉地就猛地挣扎起来，惨叫着死命蹬腿，福长安皱眉生受了几脚，却没有丝毫退让的意思，反一把板住和珅的肩头：&ldo;你的声音？！&rdo;
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