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老鸦看着桐雨秋若有所思的样子问&ldo;桐少你怎地想到问尘儿的事了?&rdo;&ldo;怎么说也是我曾经的妾,有些事情想问清楚而已&rdo;&ldo;桐少不是早就娶了妻?难不成还想接尘儿回府?这也是好事,其实那孩子进了秦月楼没少吃苦,你也知道,走了这条不归路都是不幸的,就是个命。哎,那孩子头一年身上没少伤着,不过后头学乖了,苦头也少吃了。外人看着道我们这些做老鸦的心狠,可若不这样磨磨他那性子,将来伺候客人不知轻重,到是给人玩死的都有,真不如替自己争个身份,做个头牌的还能挑挑客人,也少受些罪&rdo;&ldo;他刚进来是什么性子?&rdo;&ldo;嘿,就是个不知天高地厚的小子,脾气硬,打了照样回嘴,倔的时候死活不认,要不是硬生生关着让龟奴磨了他些日子,怎么可能软得下来?&rdo;老鸦看着桐雨秋捏紧的双手这才发觉自己说溜了嘴,忙笑着转移话题道:&ldo;说起来,当初那孩子背脊左侧有个一寸长的疤痕,我花上了半年天天用姜片给他按揉,再涂上红玉膏涂搽才让那疤痕淡褪了些,后来找刺青师特地给他纹上了曼陀花图腾,才算真正把那疤痕给盖了过去&rdo;&ldo;曼陀花?&rdo;桐雨秋想起了那一片雪白的肌肤上盛开着的妖艳花朵,从不曾放入过心上,而今想来只是模糊。『这是什么花?』『曼陀』『很美跟你的肌肤一样没有一点瑕疵』桐雨秋听见自己心跳的声音,咚咚得快要冒出嗓子眼,恨不能把那整颗心都给绞了。他不停地不停地想,那夜,当他赞赏着尘绝的曼陀赞赏着他的无暇时,那人儿的心,可也是这般,绞成了泥地在身体里跳动。为什么抱了那么久的身子,他却认不出那隐藏在曼陀下的疤痕呢?为什么摆在他桐府那么久的人,他竟无法知道那一声声的阿尘正是他的柳星辰呢?究竟是什么蒙住了他的眼?又究竟是什么,让他可以夜对日对的伤了他的心,然后还自以为是的继续怀念着他心里头的那个柳星辰?桐雨秋把脸埋在双手中,颤栗着身子,眼泪顺着手指间的缝隙滑落。爱么?他不仅自问。真的,那么的爱着柳星辰么?想来是痛,可痛的是,开始怀疑自己那么多年来的爱,究竟是给了谁?桐雨秋出了秦月楼就回了桐府,匆忙交代了些事后上了马,直直奔向了杭州。他心里叫嚣着无数的疑问,而那想要见到尘绝的心,怎么也抑制不住。他甚至不知道见着了面该说些什么做些什么!求他回来?回来后呢?继续做他的男妾?他桐雨秋有妻有子,也是发了誓不能再娶的!可就算他宁破当日之誓,尘绝会回来么?他的柳星辰能答应回来么?柳星辰十五岁那年,他们爱的正浓正烈,他指天为证地说要娶他为妻,而今,又怎么可能实现?休了黎晴?他做不到。那个温柔婉约的女子相夫教子从无过错,是个贤良淑德的妻。更何况他还有两个孩子!桐雨秋挥扬的长鞭无力垂落,得不到令的马儿放慢了速度,幽幽荡荡在林间小道上徜徉。抬头看着万里无云的一方天际,刺眼的太阳穿透过树叶的层叠,在前方的路途上射下星星点点的痕迹。『阿尘的心早就给了人,找不到了,怎么还会有心呢?』『给谁了?』『一个已经离开我很久很久的人,一个说会永远爱我永远保护我的人。』『少爷,您娶亲后,还会再找柳公子么?』『也许会,也许不会。』『若找到了,会跟他一起么?会做些什么呢?』『会很宠很宠他,好好的保护他,陪他放风筝,陪他吹玉萧,陪他吃他最爱的芙蓉糕。』『少爷会天天抱着他么?』『会啊,当然会。』『也是这么的抱着么?』『是啊,就这么抱着呢。』桐雨秋记得那夜抱着尘绝的温度。牢牢的双臂拥着的人儿,在他怀里呼吸,在他怀里哭泣。也许那时尚不明白他的眼泪,现在是明白了,也是真切的痛了。而尘绝那时的一字一句,现在听来,竟是生离时最后的贪求与奢望,祈望着一份本该属于柳星辰的幸福,等待着梦醒后尘绝要面对的诀别。『我想回杭州』『我不会留在临安,还有人在杭州等我呢,一直一直的,在等』扬起马鞭,向有着尘绝的方向奔去。
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