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他把许屹抱进怀里,第一次如此温柔地吻了对方。许坚依旧在考虑时风的话,他抽著烟,心绪不定,手指有些颤抖。如果时风说的一切都是真的,那麽自己对许屹做的一切算些什麽。他不敢想,越想越可怕。许屹忧伤无奈的哭泣,以及惊恐而慌张从自己面前跌撞地离开的背影,现在,让许坚再也没用勇气面对了。他重重地吸了口烟,急促地吐出烟丝,手里的烟再也拿不住,掉到了地上。他用手一把捂住了嘴,闭上眼,可是仍然无法阻止汹涌的眼泪往下地滴。於珍在外面陪孩子,她不解地看著紧闭的房门,不知道许坚把自己锁在里面做什麽,她似乎隐约听到了呜咽声,但却以为这是个幻觉。她抱著正吃著橘子的许冉,看著孩子的眉眼,心里越发不安。&ldo;走吧,许屹,你弟弟来接你了。&rdo;时风把外衣替他披上,想把他拉起来,可是许屹站了起来,却仍不想离开似的,站著一动也不动。最後,时风不得不叫人扶了许屹下楼。一到楼下客厅,许屹看到一个人来的许坚,脸色突然变得苍白,他侧过头,想避开了许坚的目光。但是许坚却情绪激动地走上来,一把搂住他,嘴里不停地说著对不起。许屹淡淡地望著别的方向,神情变得恍惚了起来。空气里有一种苦涩的味道,许屹觉得这味道渐渐蔓延进了嘴里,蔓延进了心里。他向来不知道这种时候该说些什麽,或许他向来也没考虑过自己在这种时候能说些什麽。有些东西太沈重,却无法放开。那种苦涩的味道越来越浓了,许屹觉得喉头发痒,他咳了起来,越来越剧烈,腰都弯了下去。许坚赶紧扶住他,然後,他看到,许屹不停喘息著,血从苍白的唇上一直滴落到地板上。&ldo;你那儿不舒服?&rdo;时风焦急地走上来询问时,许坚才觉得心里隐隐有些嫉妒,他仍紧紧扶著许屹,可是手却在发抖。许屹摇摇头,站直了身子,他伸手擦了擦嘴边的血迹,看了眼身边不安的许坚,想说什麽,可是无话可说。去医院检查,许屹因为之前受冷发烧引起了肺炎,医生叫他住院,许坚也劝他,可他怎麽也不愿意。那种一个人躺在病床上的强烈的孤独和痛苦,至今还让他不愿去想。许坚看说不动许屹,也不敢再强迫他,叫医生开了药之後,他又扶著许屹离开。&ldo;你先住在这儿好吗?&rdo;许坚没把许屹的事告诉家里,从医院那里出来後,他把许屹带到了他已经安排好的一处公寓。两室一厅的房间,非常整洁明亮。许屹刚服了药,手里还拿著玻璃杯发怔。冬日阴晦的阳光斜斜地照著他的身子,他觉得有些冷。好象又回到最初两人一起住的时候,许坚下楼去买菜,然後又去厨房做。许屹一直坐在沙发上,从见到许坚起他就保持著沈默,到现在什麽也没说,只是偶尔会不舒服地咳嗽两声。因为仓促,许坚就做了三个菜,一碟炒凤尾,一碟芹菜肉丝,一碗青菜豆腐汤。他把菜端到桌子上,这才叫许屹过来吃饭。看著许屹把著沙发扶手晃悠悠地站起来,许坚这才想起他的身子还虚弱的很,时风已经把许屹绝食的事告诉了他,许坚清楚都是自己的自私和无情让许屹伤心绝望。他走过去,扶住许屹的手臂,对方没有推开他,只是淡淡地看了眼。&ldo;哥……&rdo;许坚面对著许屹坐下,不知道该说什麽,他平时基本对许屹都是直呼其名,从未叫过他一声哥,现在他这麽叫,或多或少带了一份愧疚在里面。许屹正拿起筷子准备吃饭,他的精神已经好些了,也知道自己现在这样活著难,死却更难。他听著许坚叫他哥,突然愣了一下。一直以来,他都认为自己是一个多余的人,他从没想过被许家的人承认,但是许坚这一声哥的确让他心里起了变化。有那麽一瞬间,他似乎觉得自己有了归宿。&ldo;吃饭。&rdo;许屹最终没去多想,他打断了许坚的话,许坚尴尬地看著他,也拿起筷子,大口大口地扒拉起饭,房间里除了碗筷的碰撞声之外,竟变得静悄悄。吃了饭,许坚很想对许屹说些什麽,可是许屹只是借口累想休息,进了卧室就没再出来。&ldo;那我先走了,有事打电话给我。&rdo;许坚把自己的名片放到了床头柜上,许屹正背著身子睡觉,&ldo;一定哦。&rdo;许坚见许屹不出声,还不放心,又叮嘱了一句,许屹这才低低地应了一声,一直等到许坚出了门,他才叹了口气,坐起来。

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