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悲愤归悲愤,郑颖风暂时还是逃脱不了奴隶的命运,只好认命的替李好好跑腿,然后才能找陆羽共进午餐。陆羽对郑颖风的异样也有所觉察。这家伙最近天天神神叨叨的不知道在忙什么,每天一到下课就溜得不见人影,中午吃饭的时候,还要先消失一阵子,才回来吃饭。这种事对别人来说不算什么,可是对饿鬼投胎的郑颖风来说就是一件非常值得注意的希奇事,根据他一贯的信念:人是铁,他是钢,没有铁哪来的钢。就算是天塌下来,在没砸到他之前都要抓紧时间吃饱。&ldo;一个视吃饭为人生大事的饭桶,有什么事情能重要到让他牺牲吃饭时间?太值得研究了。&rdo;陆羽一边吃饭一边想,抬头看看墙上的钟,12点20,餐厅里的人也不多了,陆羽也不急,因为按这两天规律来看郑颖风一般会在这个时间出现。果然不出所料,他还没想完,郑颖风像一阵风似的刮进来,大叫着:&ldo;饿死了,饿死了!我的饭呢?&rdo;陆羽把饭盒拿出来,郑颖风打开一看,都是喜欢吃的饭菜,还是热的。感动得热泪盈眶:&ldo;小羽羽,你对我真是太好了。&rdo;&ldo;八戒,你最近几天忙什么呢?&rdo;陆羽决定先直接了当的问他。&ldo;八戒&rdo;是陆羽对郑颖风的爱称,曾几何时,郑颖风流着泪说:&ldo;我这么玉树临风,潇洒倜傥,你叫我八戒。这也忒侮ru人了!&rdo;陆羽说:&ldo;我要是不承认你是八戒,我也忒侮ru全天下的猪了,思量再三我还是选择侮ru你吧。&rdo;于是乎郑颖风的别号就正式定为&ldo;八戒&rdo;了。&ldo;私人有一点点小事,呵呵。&rdo;郑颖风含糊其辞,狼吞虎咽g。&ldo;哦,小事。&rdo;陆羽一点也不意外,对付郑颖风这种狡猾之徒,跟纪晓岚对付和绅是一个理:一招是根本没用的。于是点点头也不再追问,低下头微微一笑,心说:&ldo;小样,你不说我也不逼你,我看你小子什么时候露出马脚。&rdo;郑颖风看着一脸高深莫测的陆羽,呲着牙笑得有点心虚,正想开口解释,陆羽摆摆手说:&ldo;我要去练球了,你今天要是再不洗碗,我回来把你……&rdo;他做了个咔嚓的手势,转身走了。&ldo;洗碗&rdo;两个字,比催命符还有效,郑颖风全力加速,扒完了饭。可惜为时已晚,陆羽已经走的不见人影。想起陆羽临走时那种犀利的眼神和那个残暴的手势,他打了个寒颤,乖乖地去涮碗。命苦啊,边涮着碗边叹气下定决心:&ldo;下次吃饭一定要比陆羽快那么一点点。&rdo;这句话同样被周星星化腐朽为神奇用在《大话西游》里,猪八戒说,本来我比大师兄高那么一点点,因为多了你这个累赘,他才比我高那么一点点。然后流传千古。郑颖风的&ldo;奴隶&rdo;生涯(1)正如陆羽所料,郑颖风一定会露出马脚。不幸地是他很快就暴露了,不过这也是情有可原,每天为李好好当牛做马,差遣来差遣去,他想不暴露也难。这天放学前李好好发个短信,通知郑颖风,说想去家乐福买东西。正巧陆羽的篮球队有训练,郑颖风就顺手拿了陆羽的车,一边防范警察叔叔,一路卖命狂蹬,李好好催着要去家乐福。好容易到了家乐福,郑颖风累得吭哧吭哧的喘粗气,李好好显然没有什么怜香惜玉之心,不但没有贴心的来一句:&ldo;辛苦你了。&rdo;居然用一种叫&ldo;怜悯&rdo;的眼神看着郑颖风,还叹了一口似有若无的气:&ldo;唉,瞧你累得跟狗一样,真没体力,早知道我打车来了。&rdo;李好好那种眼神和语气深刻地打击到郑颖风!他堂堂一跆拳道黑道二段高手,无论身体素质,意志耐力的修为都是出类拔萃的。居然被李好好讥为没体力,这对一个普通男人来说尚且是很大的羞ru,何况是他这样的武林高手。看着李好好优雅的走进家乐福的背影,郑颖风在心里狂靠:&ldo;这什么女人哪,口刁心毒,我是为了陆曼儿才甘愿给你做牛做马,忍气吞声受你欺压,你以为我怕你啊!不体谅我为爱牺牲的伟大精神,居然还嘲笑我没体力,死妖女,等我追到陆曼儿我一脚揣你进黄浦江。&rdo;郑颖风气得几乎抓狂。好不容易压制住破口大骂的欲望,跟着李好好进了超市。今天我们的李好好将通过自己的身体力行,生动无比地向郑颖风演绎时间流逝这种形而上概念,并成功的把复杂抽象的概念形象化。按照郑颖风的逻辑,买个东西顶多花几分钟,就算是女的花费时间多点,也不过十几二十分钟。

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