第68章(第1页)
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“就算孩童无知,还留个红羽在场,真是自找麻烦!此举不是为了那三十两吧?”清平状似调笑,假作无意地突兀道,“一说我倒想起来,你那柄扇子呢?”
“哦,现下又用不着,收着呢。”说话间眼神一闪。
“不敢示人,是怕被我发现它短了一截吧?”清平自怀中取出两段竹节,轻巧丢在桌上,骨碌碌滚动,“如你所愿——封乘云在狱中自绝了!”
这一句语调阴郁,声气中听不出喜怒,脸色倒并无不悦。离春揣测良久,强辩道:
“听你说的,倒好像是我有意逼死他。”
“难道不是?你着力强调,此案真相断不可让亦然知晓,暗示他及早决断,切莫拖到公审秋决时;临分别的当口,曾在他腰间拍过两下。你是极厌恶与人相触的,除我以外的人更难得你的主动。此次反常,是要假借拍抚动作,将这两节竹管塞进他的腰带之中吧?竹筒中是那柄利刃,以及另一样令他生无可恋的物事。”
“正如你所说——生无可恋,是他自己不留恋。一个人若是拼命想活,旁人仅凭言语,又怎能将他迫入死地?死志,是早已萌生了的。那时暗中传递凶器,他立刻察觉,瞬时明白了我的苦心,于是躬身道谢,谢我助他得遂心愿。”
“他的心愿?”
“他有心赴死,却仍存牵念。怀着一个疑问,想求得答案,那就是——妻子对他有情,还是无情?这听来荒谬,明明是他手下冤魂,明明是他背叛在先,如此行为未免惺惺作态。可案件已成定局,作伪还有何收益?必是真情无疑了。本来,我对这等为私欲而杀人的案犯,绝生不出半点同情,是死是活都不干我事;但如今对此人倒是恨不起来,所以才想成全,才会拿出证据为他释疑。”
“那方蝴蝶床帐,一开始便是给他预备的?”
“不错。我坚信那其中藏有夫人的心意,制造机会让他体味罢了。”离春抓过一节竹管,从中扯出布料,上面染着片片血迹。原先排布紧密的绣线几乎全部割断,偶尔连着的几丝也杂草般四散零落着。蝴蝶轮廓的中心,一针一线清晰地刺着两字——“程云”!
“这才是他的本名吧?妻子的深情一目了然,再怎样也无法反驳了。”离春的指尖刮着那些血污,“其实,他心中比谁都要明白,却刻意自欺——说到底,他是个人,就只是个人。从头至尾,都逃不出一颗平常人心的支配:
“初时,他身份微贱,经常受人打骂,危难关头得到善良美貌的小姐庇护。因感恩而生情,并非女子独有的心境。加上之后数年日日相对,酝酿出一份纯美而毫无杂质的真情。然而,由于身世悬殊,心上人与之两情相悦,却要三缄其口;一起长大地位对等的姐妹,劝他停止妄想;在长辈眼中,佳婿另有其人,而这情敌全不将他放在眼里。一切种种,当时年纪尚轻的他,怎能不去在乎?人一旦抑郁到了极处,越是世所不容的事情,就越要去做:‘既然天下人都以为我配她不上,我今日就赌咒发誓,非将她娶为妻子不可’。由单纯爱恋变得执着于‘得到’,很多赌气的成分在;两人之间的情感,也许还未达到可结连理的程度。这一下冒进,即使最终成功,根基也不稳了。等他得偿所愿,正要舒一口气时,却发觉自己跳出仆人的行列,倒成了永远低人一等的赘婿。在岳家许多事都作不得主,又因明镜寺之祸惨遭迁怒,唯一的儿子竟不能传嗣程姓香火。处处受制于人的根源,正是结了这门亲。于是,妻子便从保护他不受欺负的人,变成了直接压迫他的人。
“长期处于失衡的情境,这日子要怎么过?好在他们很快离了闽南。来到长安后,如同拨云见日,他的心态稍见平和,试图寻觅一条和缓的途径,以消除自卑。刻苦修养之余,在京畿这陌生之地着意掩饰着赘婿的身份。刚踏进封家时,我便察觉到主人似乎在隐藏什么秘密。以那宅院的大小,仆人实在太过稀少了。红羽标榜老爷不爱排场,但听那‘牡丹姑娘艳名远播,名头越盛,面子越大’的言论,显然不是个低调的人。有心又兼具财力,却并未招摇过市,恐怕是迫于形势,怕人多纰漏大,有眼尖的看出主人间关系的不寻常。封家在此定居五年,下人中资历最深的管事却只来了两年,之前的一段时日,难道无人伺候?或者是集中地更换过一次仆人?是因为那隐秘暴露了,旧人不可再用吗?
“由此可见,他对入赘一事何等在意!夫人体贴,想也察觉了,于是放低身段,竭力作个贤妻;为免触及丈夫心中伤痛,尽量不去张扬往事,甚至连父亲都不常提起。只是,这世道高低贵贱如此分明,无论身处上位者如何迁就,受欺压的一方也不甘心领情。因为,人一旦陷入某种心境,便难以自拔,任何一件无关的事情都能与之牵连上。例如,别个男子沾惹红颜,正妻不依时,他们甚至窃喜‘是娘子爱我呢’;而同样的事落到他身上,他便以为‘玉蝶管制我,只因我是赘婿,是专属于她的’。如此,越是相处,隔阂越深,越觉差异巨大。此时,已有些绝望了。为了反抗,才愈加往青楼去。这只是手段,要借此证明自己可以与旁人一样;妻子忍让了,便觉得扬眉吐气。他对牡丹姑娘并无情感,连迷恋都称不上。说到迎娶她时——妻子已逝而再娶,应叫做‘续弦’;他却说‘纳妾’。在他心目中,这女子至多是个‘妾’,而‘妻’只有一人!
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