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我扶着云毓，已经坐在了地上，我不知该如何说，挣扎了又挣扎，也只能再说了一句话：&ldo;随雅，你想拿话堵我，也别作践你自己。&rdo;云毓终于又抬了头看我，我再向他商量道：&ldo;你当我什么都没说过，起来行么。&rdo;云毓依然不动，本王终于被他逼得说了几句真心实意的话，&ldo;月华阁那件事，我知道你心里有事，喝多了，方才那么做。本王……我……是怕我自家当了真。&rdo;我的两只手本来都攥着云毓的衣袖，现在松开了，竟然出了些潮汗：&ldo;随雅，不瞒你说，从以前到如今，你是唯一一个和我不大拘礼走得近些的人。王妃也罢，那些我瞧上过的人也罢，乃至楚寻，没谁真的心里放过本王。柳相，更不可能了……&rdo;事实上，本王唯一求的，就是能有谁真的和我互相把对方往心里装一装。说说话喝喝茶聊个天，成天这么过，一辈子不腻，就行了。可那个人若是云毓，事情便不大妙了。那日月华阁之后，有些事本王已想到了，却不能有。就算有了，也不能认。我道：&ldo;只是，现在这个时候，谈这种事有害无益。随雅，你……你知道，本王是断袖，假如本王喜欢了随雅，那可麻烦了。&rdo;云毓看着我，半晌，挑起了眉：&ldo;那是，真的就麻烦了，王爷喜欢的可是柳相，怎么能看上臣？王爷断然不会移情别恋。&rdo;他一面说，一面终于站了起来。本王总算松了口气，也站起身：&ldo;随雅……&rdo;云毓叹了口气：&ldo;王爷请放心，月华阁的那件事，不会再有。臣心里的，只在心里放着，不会说出来。&rdo;我道：&ldo;随雅……&rdo;云毓看着我，忽然一笑：&ldo;臣开玩笑的，月华阁那时，的确心里有事，喝多了。如果真的想做什么，倘若王爷登基了，臣更成了娈佞之臣了。这个名声可不大好，纵使脸皮厚，也扛不大住，还是不要了。&rdo;他再笑一笑：&ldo;今日就说到这里罢了。有些事王爷与臣都当做没发生过罢，臣想告退了。&rdo;我看着他躬身行礼，我和他一道出了水榭，走过浮廊向岸上去。一路之上，云毓都没再说过话，本王更说不出什么。云毓到了对岸，便即刻离去，一刻也没多呆，他走后，本王就回房中坐，半天都没缓过来。我算真的怕了云毓了，他拿刀子往我心窝里戳了半日，一下比一下狠，我想他早知道了。知道我其实喜欢他。柳桐倚是一个桂香中水波月色的梦，正是他在水榭中的两句话让我梦醒了，明白了切切实实的好处。月华阁一事，我虽不想琢磨，却不得不琢磨，联系以往种种，云毓这样做毫无道理，除非……除非他看上本王了。这个想法比较大胆，本王这把年纪，本不该做如此春风少年的想象。但不由自主就想到了。再对照云毓近日的行径……想象越发切实。不知道为什么，有了这个想象后，本王心中竟有了种莫名的喜悦，喜悦之后却是悲哀。造反在即，此事之后，本王将如何，云毓将如何？无论如何没有好结果。我算计云毓，实属不义，这也许就是报应。只是这个报应，为何也有云毓一份？所以这件事，本王不打算认账。我正在卧房中煎熬，皇宫中又有使臣来，说皇帝堂侄有事传召。皇命大如天，我只得换了身朝服赶进宫去。皇帝堂侄眉头微锁，满脸心事重重，他看着本王，问：&ldo;皇叔怎么满面愁容，似有心事？&rdo;我连忙道，没什么，只是韩四不知好歹，不肯娶女王，臣正在开导他。启赭道：&ldo;哦，韩四么，朕就觉得他可能不会痛快去做王夫，皇叔不擅开导无妨，云毓常到皇叔王府中去，可让他开导开导？&rdo;我的心跳了一跳，忙道：&ldo;云大夫恐怕也不太擅长此事……&rdo;启赭抬手道：&ldo;算了，朕今天懒得纠缠王夫之事，云毓不擅开导，朕就让最会开导的柳相去皇叔府中开导韩四。&rdo;当真就喊人上前，传了道口谕，让柳桐倚去我怀王府中和韩四聊聊天。本王眼睁睁看着宦官领命下去，不知道皇帝堂侄卖的什么药。启赭绕回御座上坐，又让人搬了把椅子在本王身边，露出牙齿笑道：&ldo;好了，柳相去皇叔府上和韩四聊天，皇叔就在这里陪朕聊聊天罢。朕也没有什么大事，只是心里有些话，想和人聊聊。&rdo;牙齿又多露出半颗，&ldo;皇叔先坐。&rdo;
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