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温禧拈起火柴梗,划亮了火柴,火苗随着气流颤抖着,她用手拢了拢,小心翼翼地替莫傅司点了烟。烟雾袅袅升腾开来,莫傅司的脸隐藏在烟雾里,影影绰绰,像表面氧化了的油画。红色的光点明明灭灭,莫傅司时不时悠悠啜吸一口,然后徐徐喷吐出一阵烟雾。他神情邈远,不知道在想什么。温禧只觉得他手中的香烟气味似乎和寻常的焦油味不同,带着一股奇异的味道,闻得久了,便让人觉得脑袋有些发晕。有节奏的敲门声突然响起,门外是一个毫无起伏的声音,&ldo;二少爷,大公让您现在去书房一趟。&rdo;莫傅司眉毛重重一拧,也用平直的声音回道,&ldo;r3haю。&rdo;(我知道了)一面将香烟在一个景泰蓝的磁碟子里揿灭了。&ldo;你先睡。&rdo;交待了这么一句,莫傅司起身出了房门。卧室只剩下了温禧一个人。她怔怔地盯着景泰蓝的烟灰盘子,那里面静静地躺着一截香烟。纤细雪白的烟身,上面还有金色的图案,烟灰也不是寻常香烟燃烧后的灰白色残骸,而要白得多,也细密得多。温禧鬼使神差地伸出手去,小心翼翼地拿起了这根香烟,然后又一次擦亮了火柴,点上了这一段吸残了的烟。看着它烧了片刻,温禧迟疑地凑近了烟蒂,一副想靠近又不敢靠近的模样。眼见着香烟的长度就快要明显变短,这才哆哆嗦嗦地吸了一口,然后飞快地将香烟依旧熄灭,搁在景泰蓝磁碟里。其实基本上什么都没有吸到,但温禧就是觉得心中洋溢着一种奇妙的快乐,战战兢兢的快乐,偷来的快乐。我一定是疯了,温禧想,她居然做出了这样痴心的事,痴心得让她觉得羞惭。依稀有脚步声传来,温禧赶紧躺下来,阖上了双目。莫傅司推门进了卧室。他并没有直接上c黄,而是走到窗前,站了半晌。鸫鸟,夜枭的叫声已经渐渐稀落,一轮圆月挂在天空,黄白色的月亮,蓝黑色的天空,像黑白分明的京剧脸谱。莫傅司有些烦躁地看了看天上的鬼脸子,又扭头去看温禧。她正蜷着身子,黑发遮盖住了小半张脸,也许都睡着了。他默默地望着她,他已经有多少年没有踏踏实实睡过觉了?时间太久,以至于他都觉得似乎是上辈子的事。以前是不敢,现在是不能,莫傅司自嘲地勾起唇角,他的人生,简直就是黑色幽默。一声不响地坐在c黄沿,莫傅司如同一尊沉默的石膏像,在黯淡的灯光下形成一个灰黑色的剪影。温禧不敢动弹,她小心地控制着自己的呼吸,竭力装作睡熟了的样子。他还是一动不动地做着,背朝着她,温禧忍不住偷偷睁开眼睛,觑着他的背影。他的头用一种懒洋洋的、柔软的几乎显得悲伤的下垂姿势朝下弯去,仿佛背负着巨大的忧伤,温禧望着他低垂的脖颈,忽然觉得一股莫名的悲凉,为他,也为自己。视线偏移,温禧的眼光又落在了景泰蓝的烟灰盘子上,盘子里的烟灰依然保持着完整的形状,并没有散撒成粉末。再看看莫傅司,此刻的他也就像这么一截烟灰,不明朗,不乐观,也没有希望,但却带着一种不奔溃的尊严和不狼狈的痛楚,不知道为什么,温禧觉得这样的他,比往日的他更加动人。正在胡思乱想之际,莫傅司忽然躺倒在c黄上,惊得温禧赶紧闭上了眼睛。他们现在躺的c黄尺寸远远不及莫宅里那张华盖c黄,因为窄的缘故,两人离得非常近,几乎是依偎在一起。温禧可以嗅到他身上的苦艾气味,里面还伴着烟味,分外惑人。趁着莫傅司摁灭c黄头灯的时候,温禧赶紧挪了挪身体。莫傅司倒没有起疑,他只是闭上了眼睛,放任自己沉浸在黑暗里。感官因为夜晚而愈发敏锐,莫傅司能够清楚地听见在他的耳根底下就是放大了的她呼吸的鼻息,一声又一声。莫傅司的睫毛轻轻动了动,像花蕊上扑翅欲飞的蝶。夜,深沉。然后天色缓缓发白。清晨的天空像被冻住了,是一片奇妙的冰蓝色。刚醒来的温禧惊讶地发现身侧的c黄铺空着,但c黄单上还保留着身体辗转的细小痕迹,她伸出手细细地将每一丝褶皱抚平,动作温柔一如爱抚。莫傅司从盥洗间里出来时看见的就是这样一副场景,她神态虔诚而专注,直到他故意清了清嗓子,才慌乱地抬起了头,却始终不敢与他对视。心底涌现出一种复杂的情绪,莫傅司蹙起眉毛,面无表情地坐在房间里的椅子上,阖目养神。
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