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周子璋无法拒绝,他闭上眼,近乎贪婪地贴上林正浩的怀抱,双手迟疑着,终于也环上他的腰背。林正浩呵呵低笑,在他耳边问:&ldo;是我想的那样吗?子璋?&rdo;周子璋圈紧了臂膀。林正浩用力回抱了他,带笑说:&ldo;太好了,太好了。子璋,我知道你心里藏着事,也许,要你接受一个男人也很难,不过没关系的,无论怎么样,我们都一起面对好吗?&rdo;这句话犹如一桶冷水从头浇下,周子璋立即清醒过来,他痛苦地挣脱开林正浩的怀抱,别过脸去不看他的眼睛,哑声说:&ldo;我,我不能答应你。&rdo;&ldo;子璋?&rdo;林正浩困惑地看着他,伸出手,试图重新拥抱周子璋,但看到他眉宇间的痛楚,却终究放下手去,换上温柔的微笑,柔声说:&ldo;我理解你的犹豫,没关系的,换成是我,也要考虑好长一段时间。&rdo;他越是这样,周子璋心中越是翻江倒海,痛得呼吸都艰难,他闭上眼,无望地摇了摇头。手上一暖,已经被林正浩牢牢握住,温暖仿佛从手上一直传到心底。刹那间,像有看不见的导火索,轰然一声,顷刻间将那些摇摆不定的犹豫烧成灰烬,烧炙到周子璋眼眶润湿,在这一刻,他确乎明白,自己对这个男人如此渴望,全身心都向往着跟他在一起,叫嚣着要将生命中美好的东西给予他,分享他。那个光彩四溢的门户,允诺着传说中的幸福宁馨,昭示你想也想不来的快乐欢欣,就这么打开了,毫无戒备,仿佛你只需再上前一步,一步而已,你能真正进入。然而,这一步之遥,却怎么也迈不过去。周子璋心里痛如刀搅,越是渴望,就越是痛楚,没有办法啊,这样的身体,其后带着种种丑陋不堪,你怎么有胆量在这个男人破开来?你怎么够厚颜无耻在这么好的男人面前告诉他你其实有多肮脏?世界上最滑稽的事莫过于此,老天爷终于将你不敢奢望的幸福呈现在你面前,如此斑驳多彩,可是你够不着,就差那么一点点距离,你还是够不着。这是命,你没有办法抵抗的命运,你天生不具备这样的幸运,天生注定,就算想要的东西近在咫尺,可还是罩着你穿不透的玻璃罩,你眼睁睁看着,拿不到,就是拿不到。&ldo;子璋,真的没关系,我可以等,&rdo;林正浩善解人意地劝慰他,摩挲着他的手,脸上带着暖到你心神融化的微笑,目光清澈坚定,深深看着他,说:&ldo;我等了很久,才遇到你,可以等更久,我有足够的耐性。&rdo;周子璋的眼泪直直流了下来,他摇摇头,一句话也说不出,伸出手,胡乱抹去自己脸上的泪水,惨淡一笑,豁出去说:&ldo;不是这样的,其实我……&rdo;&ldo;算了,别说了。&rdo;林正浩怜惜地叹了口气,重新将他抱入怀中,手臂有力,胸膛宽阔温暖,声音柔和如潺潺水流:&ldo;傻孩子,虽然不知道你在担心什么,但你听我说,我从第一眼看到你,就已经很喜欢你了,我不想吓着你,是因为不知道你能不能接受同性,也不知道,你对我的感觉如何。我渴望跟你在一起,所以找了不少机会靠近你,&rdo;他低声笑了起来:&ldo;要传出去大概会被人笑死,我林正浩居然也有拿自己外甥女当借口的时候。&rdo;&ldo;可是,我的感觉,归根到底都是我的事,你不用当成一个负担,&rdo;林正浩顿了顿说:&ldo;我向往两情相悦,可更舍不得让你为难,你只要记得,我在等你就好了,如果你觉得没必要让我等,那就明白说,没关系的,人活到我这个年纪,更相信缘分。&rdo;他更紧地圈住周子璋,迟疑了一下,终于侧过脸,吻了吻他的脸颊,微笑说:&ldo;真想就这么一直抱着你,但我可不愿意你怕我。&rdo;周子璋伏在他肩膀上,用力摇了摇头。林正浩笑了,爱怜地抚摩他的后背,柔声问:&ldo;你对我也有感觉的,对不对?&rdo;岂止有感觉,但问题是,有感觉又怎么样?周子璋闭着眼,一言不发。&ldo;你呀,&rdo;林正浩喟叹一声,一点也不着恼,仍旧圈着他,也不逼他说了,就这么两人静静偎依着。不知过了多久,身边驶过的车辆提醒了周子璋,这还是在大马路上。他羞赧地挣脱开,林正浩也不勉强,只是笑着摸了摸他的头,重新帮他系好安全带,发动车子,继续往前开。这次去的地方不同寻常,是乃是一间极为清雅的素菜馆,外头是茶室,里面才是吃饭的包间,以一大片黄梨木雕就的大型屏风为隔断,一旁的博古架上尽是精美的仿古陶瓷。一进门,已经传来断续的古琴声,夹杂着另一边流水墙上的潺潺流水声,古意盎然。林正浩对周子璋轻声说:&ldo;这的素菜很有名,不过只招待会员,我吃过一次后觉得不错,所以就想带你来尝尝。&rdo;
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