第96章(第3页)
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我说不出什么反驳的话。
没怀疑过吗?
我不知道。
但正如第一次见面时,他看我眼神陌生,我心如刀绞,却又松了口气。
或许有太多迹象,明明靠近真相,却被我有意无意忽视抛弃。
我明白不知者无罪。
所以我选择当一个不知者。
我快要窒息。
燕鸣山的手捂住我的口鼻,呼吸全在他掌控之间。
他允许我活,我便能活。他要我灭亡,我便是他的祭品。
濒临昏厥时,他终于松开了手。
生泪水从眼眶涌出,我大口大口喘气,觉得自己快要呼吸过度。
“对不……”
话没说完,我被人拉进怀里。
燕鸣山的指节不耐烦地没入我间,讨厌极了过短的触感,和不符合他审美的颜色。
又像是讨厌我的“对不起”。
他的动作透露着无边暴躁,语气却温柔。
18岁和29岁的两种他似乎在刹那间融合,哪一个他都想要咬住我的脖颈,于唇齿间掌控我性命。
“我原谅你。我说过,你做什么,我都会原谅你。”
“你可以对我无条件索取,毕竟我是你的什么来着?你经常说的,‘神明’吧。”
“爱,解,尊重,信任……只要不再离开我,你想要这些我没有的东西,我都给。”
“Jaime。”
他这么叫我。
我新生的姓名落入他手中,我新生的灵魂再次被囚。
“爱我是挺辛苦的事。”
我被他推倒在床。
“你再辛苦一点。”
窗帘被他拉上,白昼黑夜颠倒。
我想做的辩驳,我想许的承诺,我想再次倾诉的告白,尽数被他堵入口中,嵌入肢体。
到声音破碎,感官失灵,他也依旧在我耳边说着一语双关的话。
“……再辛苦一点吧。”
“留在我身边,哪怕什么也得不到。”
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