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而沈雷不着痕迹地将他推开，和他相隔半丈，毕恭毕敬地鞠躬拱手道：&ldo;谢少主公关心，属下没事。&rdo;白霁昀不可置信地瞪着沈雷，沈雷哥推开他了！沈雷哥把他推开了！不像以往那样微笑着摸着头自个儿的头，笑吟吟地对他说回来了……沈雷哥不要他了！一阵气血翻滚，白霁昀后退了几步，猛然一股腥热自胸口涌了上来，一口鲜血喷了出口，眼前一黑，身子一软便要倒下，模糊之中似听到一声疾呼&ldo;昀儿&rdo;，沈雷哥！31&ldo;没什么大碍，只是他身子本来就虚，又加上一时情急，气血逆转攻心，所以才会吐血，休息几日就没事了。&rdo;端木香香为白霁昀看过以后对沈雷说，看向始终一脸忧色握着白霁昀的手的沈雷，那面容之下还隐着苍白倒让她更为担忧，&ldo;倒是你还未痊愈就这般跑出来见了风，小心要落下一辈子的病根！对以后再孕也有影响……&rdo;&ldo;再孕？&rdo;沈雷凄然一笑，他和昀儿还有可能吗？这般的笑容看在端木香香眼里也令她不禁揪心，不自觉地多看了白霁昀一眼，这绝美的男子究竟是怎样一个人竟能伤沈雷这样沈稳的人如此之深！这些人到底在谋求什么，又为了什么将爱己之人一伤再伤……&ldo;我先出去了……&rdo;轻叹着，转身离去。沈雷并没有说话，只是默默地瞧着还在昏睡中的白霁昀，他的心里便像打翻了五味瓶一般杂乱无章，道不出心中到底是何种滋味。本说是要好好休养一个月的，既是为了养身体又是为了观测白霁昀，而得知白霁昀竟然病倒，他再难按捺住自己，怎么也不放心地不顾自己的身子便赶来了……只是再见到白霁昀他却无法制止自己想到自己那个无缘的孩子──本就千疮百孔的心便又多被扎出了几个血淋淋的窟窿，那一刻他甚至有了转头便走再不见白霁昀的念头！而看着白霁昀当着自己的面吐血，他整个胸腔便似空了一般，一声本能的&ldo;昀儿&rdo;就这么冲口而出，而这一声&ldo;昀儿&rdo;也让他知道就算白霁昀这般待自己，他终究还是无法割舍下对他的爱意。瞧着白霁昀那苍白得失了往日光彩的面容，他忍不住轻轻抚摸着，细细想来，自白霁昀的成人礼开始到这一次的黄巾乱匪，都是白霁昀设着圈套来算计自己的，他原先还只当白霁昀拿自己对付张廷敬而已，其实是拿张廷敬对付自己！昀儿啊昀儿，你若让我死我绝不皱半下眉头，可你却像防着外人一般防着我算计我！叫我如何不痛心！还有……还有我们的孩子就这般莫名其妙地成了牺牲品！思及这些，沈雷又不想看到白霁昀，站起身便要离去，却又听到白霁昀突然叫喊了几声&ldo;沈雷哥……&rdo;，他猛一回头瞧向他，白霁昀还未醒只是无意识地呢喃着，那紧闭的眼角还微微渗出几滴泪水，他一下子又心软起来，怅然慨息，自己对白霁昀始终是心狠不起来，坐到白霁昀的边上，轻轻地为他擦拭去眼角的泪花。&ldo;沈雷哥……别走……别走……沈雷哥……别离开我……&rdo;白霁昀似在做噩梦一般焦急地叫嚷着，双手不断地在半空中挥舞着，眼角的泪滴越渗越多。看得沈雷一阵心酸，一把抓住白霁昀挥舞着的手，将他冰凉如水的手放到自己同样冰冷的面颊之上小心翼翼地磨蹭着，昀儿啊，你既这般算计于我，又为何让陆启垣来救援又为何要亲自跑来寻找与我又为何梦吟之中唤着我的名字，你可知我的心也是肉长的，经不起这般折腾，经不起这灭了希望又燃起这似有若无的火花的奢望……白霁昀的行事他已越来越看不透猜不着了，到底对他有情无情有爱无爱，他真的是茫然自失，而他对白霁昀的最后一点自信也已被击得粉碎……昀儿，你倒叫我如何是好……若是这微弱的火苗再被灭掉那他唯有被打入阿鼻地狱一路了……瞧着在梦中不断哀泣着的白霁昀，沈雷心中几番挣扎，最终还是守在了他的身边。白霁昀昏迷了一夜，到了第二日方醒来，醒来之时，看到沈雷在自己身边紧握着自己的手，心中大喜，沈雷哥始终是他的沈雷哥！&ldo;沈雷哥……&rdo;白霁昀一发声才发现自己虚弱得连说话都已极为吃力。而一夜未眠的沈雷见他已经醒来，收起了各种心思，放开他的手，淡淡地道：&ldo;少主公醒了，我去吩咐他们熬些粥来，您且好好休息。&rdo;那疏远的口吻令白霁昀的喜悦立刻被泼了冰水，整个人都寒彻起来，沈雷哥知道了那些事吗？所以他恨自己了……要离开自己了！
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